What’s your Marathon?

 

Not quite an everyday sight – a lone walker, trudging along by the roadside. A small cloth bundle expertly balanced on his head and swathed in black from head to toe, he was a strange sight to behold as I drove through Bandipur national park – A forest reserve know for its population of tigers. While his appearance makes his intent quite evident, the first question that popped into my mind was why someone would choose to undertake the journey on foot. He was not the first such pilgrim I’d encountered, but the fact remained that he had over 350 kilometers to walk, to get to his destination from where he was right now. (That’s over 80 hours of walking time from where he was, a fact Google will attest to).

The faithful typically undertake the pilgrimage to Sabarimala once a year (or as often as they see fit), a journey that commences with a 41 day period of abstinence, or the ‘vratham‘. It is a personal challenge of sorts for some, a divine experience for others, and often – a chance to lose weight while earning some spiritual brownie points on the side. Whatever be the process one goes through, there’s no changing the fact that it takes significant levels of determination, self-control and a certain level of fitness to be able to undertake a challenge of such proportions. Much like a marathon.

There’s no question that it will be a life changing experience. The mind travels as much as the body does, or more – making new discoveries about the self in the process. As the eyes take in new sights, the mind opens up to new truths hitherto unseen. There’s probably no way to explain this, until the feeling is experienced.

It’s not about what you’re doing – it’s more to do with which part of you is doing it. Any activity that you put a little bit of your soul into, is bound to take you places.

Everybody finds their marathon. Activities that they undertake, despite physical and mental hardships – to arrive at a sense of peace, achievement and satisfaction to whatever level possible. What works, is something each and every person has to determine for themselves. I know folks who go trekking in the Himalayas or go on long drives or rides, others who attend meditation programmes, there are some who read/ write or sketch with zen like regularity, and yet others who practice music or sport, or train at a gym with a furious sense of discipline.

Many of these are often pursuits that leave one exhausted – be it physically or mentally. Yet they enrich lives in ways more than one. Your marathon will make you go from a ‘lesser you’ to a ‘better you’ – resulting in smiles all around. You might not be a runner, but you’ll find your marathon.

What’s yours?

The Great Escape

I do not have any illusions of a grand escape. It doesn’t have to be great, is what I mean. The smaller instances qualify equally well in my opinion, if not more.

The surprise of not running into a maddening traffic jam on my daily commute, getting through a tiring yet strong run on a lethargic morning, the satisfaction in typing out an elegantly worded e-mail, watching a sudden shower paint the dusty trees green, running into an old friend in an unexpected fashion – or even an impromptu WhatsApp conversation with someone I haven’t heard from in a while. There are a multitude of these tiny windows of ‘escape’ that grace your day more often than you think. The trick is in being able to recognize one as it unfurls.

There is an inherent need for escape that keeps surfacing in all of us. Why else would you think the whole world today reaches for their phones every few minutes? A quick glance through the WhatsApp groups, a sneak peek into the Facebook feed, a few tittering minutes spent on Twitter, or an instant of Instagram. Technology has made it easier than ever to ‘get away’ today.

This is more of an interruption though, the way I see it. A distraction is not quite the same as an escape – one will interrupt your chain of thought and leave you a little confused, while the other will pop a productive thought into your head, and allow you to come back enthused. One will tear you away from what you’re doing, while the other may not. Despite the connotations of the word, an escape need not be always be detached from what you’re doing otherwise.

I feel it all the time. Not having to constantly worry about what I’m saying or doing, in light of what someone else might construe it to be, having a conversation in which I’m being understood exactly the way I want to be, being silent just because, well, I can be – In a way, just the simple act of being able to be myself. That possibly would count as the most welcome escape today – being able to let down your guard and rid yourself of those ‘societal’ garbs that you don all the time, not knowing when you’ll be able to slip out of them and relax in your own skin.

Escape, in that sense, is just like effort – it is the little bits that matter. My grand plans of taking a mammoth swing at the task at hand when I’m ‘ready for it’ almost always fail to materialize. However, taking little stabs at it as and when possible, keeping the ball moving whenever I can, ensuring continuity in the form of small ‘packages’ of effort that eventually add up, seems to work pretty well. That way, one doesn’t even truly realize how something got done. The magic just adds up.

The value of small is vastly underrated. A much awaited coffee break in the middle of a grueling work-day makes so much more of a difference than you may credit it with. Of course, I’m sure a two week Euro trip is not without merit either. But for that, there’s MasterCard.

 

Feed that fire

A wish, a thought, a passing fancy even. You never really know what it starts as.
There is no saying how the germ of an idea will worm its way into your mind. But when the opportunity arises, it will. And once in, it will firmly cocoon itself among other thoughts, biding its time. It will feed off the intermittent flashes of inspiration, random bouts of resolve and scraps of disoriented dialogue with the self, in the mind. Much like an orphaned child in this cruel world, it has to fend for itself, in order to survive. There is nobody to tend to it, let alone provide the necessary nourishment to flourish. But if it has taken root deep enough, survive it will. It does not know it yet, but it is a long and arduous journey that it has to undertake – a journey fraught with the perils of indecision, compromises, complacency, and worst of all, resignation.

The sole saving grace here is the thin trickle of passion that might eventually find its way to the idea. Be warned though – this is no unending reservoir of strength yet. It is a small pool of clear thoughts that may or may not get recharged in the harsh cycle of seasons. It dwindles with every passing summer, with little hope of replenishment. The monotonous maladies of everyday life quickly exhaust this wonderful little watering hole, leaving behind nothing but the sludge of despair that quickly takes on hues of treacherous quicksand. Passion thus rendered lifeless leaves a void into which the best of souls get helplessly sucked. There is no coming out of this black hole.

Don’t leave your fate to the seasons. You can, and should take control.
Protect, and propagate your little pool of passion – for it is this that will eventually become your life-blood. Have it seep into everything you do, and see how much of a marked and effortless improvement you’re able to register. Let frequent showers of self-belief and practice revitalize your passion. Every step that you take in this direction makes a difference, whether you see it right then, or not. And it is this elixir of passion that helps your ‘core-idea’ grow from strength to strength. You might do different things in your life, but the desires that took root deep inside you will also grow, as they find sustenance. What started as a minuscule idea will grow fast and strong, finding expression through the things you do, and yearn to do. This little seed of a thought will eventually grow into something so big and overwhelming, that it’ll be impossible to ignore anymore. Its tiny voice will grow louder and louder until it drowns out everything else in your head, finding resonance with your soul. If and when that happens, you finally know. You encounter your Buddha moment.

There is a lesson in here somewhere. Surviving against odds, perseverance in the face of adversity, *living* and not just surviving, not getting bogged down by life, etc. Lessons are good. They help build character despite being mostly in poor taste – a lot like health food.

You might think that you probably already know all of this.
I have news for you – yes, you do. But what have you done about it?
You have been warned.

The tide cometh

Brutus:
There is a tide in the affairs of men.
Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune;
Omitted, all the voyage of their life
Is bound in shallows and in miseries.
-Julius Caesar Act 4, scene 3

Brutus sure knew what he was talking about.
Wait, scratch that. What am I saying?

Shakespeare was right. Not that he needs me to endorse him, but yes, he was. We are all (of course he meant men and women – but then you already knew that, didn’t you?) subject to the vagaries of time and the weather. There is absolutely no saying what is in store, and when. You are driving along the highway with a tune on your lips and a song in your heart, and suddenly, bang – you’re left with a flat tyre and the horrifying prospect of having to wrestle with the wheel wrench. There’s no saying whether that innocuous looking cloud will pave the way for a nice mellow afternoon or come rain on your party.

But we’re getting ahead of ourselves now. This is not what Shakespeare was getting at. Yes, life is more or less unpredictable. However, there are subtle indications – little pointers that life sends your way – for the discerning few who are willing to look for it. I particularly like the ‘tide’ reference he makes here. The sea reference was probably his snide way of hinting at the constant need to stay ‘afloat’. While you’re engaged in this struggle, there will be days when the sea becomes an aide, helping you along with a tide and a gentle current, while there will be other days when this very ally turns its back on you, dragging you away and tossing you around with impunity. Therefore, the course of action that such a situation demands becomes very clear – always carry a life jacket, an inflatable boat with an outboard motor, a reliable sat-nav system, back-up batteries and canned tuna (not to forget the all-important magnetic shark-repellent).
Bah, I jest.
Be prepared for the tide.

If you have a sense of what’s coming, you’re better equipped to deal with it. Okay, so you’re no astrologer, you say? Very well – forget what’s coming. Ensure you have a good grip on what’s happening right now. Be aware of the situation you are in, and beware of the consequences it can lead to. Have an important deadline to meet, but feeling lethargic? Ensure that you understand the gravity of the situation, and what it could lead to, if you don’t meet the said deadline. This heightened sense of awareness is what’s required in each and every one of your waking moments. We’re all here with a clock that’s ticking away pretty fast, and it is extremely important to make each moment count. There are limited resources you have, there is limited energy you can spend, and there’s limited time to do it in. So keep your eyes and ears open, and know what to do, and when. The stars will align, the cosmic forces will conspire, and the gates will open. It is entirely up to you to ensure that you’re ready for it when this happens. If you’ve not been paying attention, if you’re too caught up treading water and trying to ‘survive’, the chances are you’ll not notice any help that you’re getting. Train yourself to look for the signs, sit up when the wind sock changes direction, and trim your sails to catch the breeze. Make time for life.
Your tide awaits.

The Empire is struck back

I haven’t posted written or posted in ages.

There – we have it. A statement, a fact. Out in the open, for the whole world to see.
I’m having problems with… let’s see… if I were to list them out:
• Free flow of thought
• Self satisfying adequacy of self expression
• Resolve retention
Having put that down, they would be some among the ‘bouquet’ of critical factors holding me at ransom (to put it in management parlance). Not that I am lacking in all the above aspects entirely, but, there are moments, more often than I would like, which have seen me to be wanting in at least one among these multiples. An objective assessment of the situation does not seem very plausible, given the fact that the assessor here has to assess himself. A fair amount of subjectivity is bound to creep in (not to mention justifications, self sustaining undeniable arguments from and to the self, and worst of all, excuses). Such being the state of affairs, I am bound to resort to different approaches to try and get myself out of this rut. The first one being – thinking out loud, translating thoughts to words, and putting out a narrative.
Reader kindly note, this would also (as far as my memory serves me,) make it my first attempt at a narrative.

Coerced elicitation of prose, a manner of intimidation of the mind of sorts, does present itself as a starting point.
This would involve throwing all caution to the winds, settling for the stream of thought that pours out (if it does, that is) without pausing to make corrections, thinking of a better alternative, or letting the output take any pleasing format. The focus here is on quantity – not quality. The underlying assumption being, forcing one into an attempt repetitively will eventually result in clarity, focus and direction. After all, practice does have a role to play in honing perfection. However, being a purist at heart, and harbouring heightened sensitivity to the quality of output makes this approach lose appeal (unless of course, one is stoned cold). Add to this the steady diet of ‘stiff-upper-lip’ writing that one has subject oneself to (as well as largely enjoyed), there is a natural elimination the above approach as an option.

Awaiting the ‘strike’ – the glorious moment when inspiration presents itself, letting itself lose in an unbridled fashion on the self and bringing forth the very best in one, is an alternative. Without doubt, the quality of output in this case would surpass every other, bringing with it an absolute sense of satisfaction and pride. The hurdle here, however, is the frequency of such ‘occurrences’ – which happen only far and between. Given the overall scarcity of frequency of the option under consideration, this may not seem a very fruitful solution to opt for. The build up of dissatisfaction, the lack of results, and the semblance of futility add up to a potent potion for melancholy.

A structured approach on the other hand, may prove more meaningful in the current context. Regular bits of authoring, be it random at heart, with adequate attention to detail, resulting in smaller doses of productivity – quantitatively, as well as qualitatively.

If this does not qualify for a start, nothing will.
Sustenance is what should follow.